So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is