have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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