If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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