But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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