white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
My vagina just recognized that song.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
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