after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
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