That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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