a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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