hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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