what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
