If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
