You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
