Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
