Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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