She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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