i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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