I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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