I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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