i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I looked at my own cervix.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident