Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!