New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
