First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize