After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
