Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
She has the best kind of daddy issues
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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