Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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