Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
