South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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