it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
