Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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