it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize
