I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
