all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say š
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
At least Iām an āessential employeeā and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesnāt ask why Iām essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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