i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She told me I should be a condom model.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
