Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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