Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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