I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize