I seem to have left my pride at pride
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
