She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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