you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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