Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n