I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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