It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize