just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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