you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
