A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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