I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
