FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize