ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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