Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
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