I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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