She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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