Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
